Nada Yoga - At One with Concert Music

Here in the concert hall, the energy is crisp. The crowd is entranced, hanging off each and every note. Ricocheting off the ceiling was the sound of my son shifting in his seat. There he sat alert and aware, his tiny frame at risk of being swallowed by the recoil of the fancy concert seat.

"Try to really listen to the music," I said to my three-year-old as we sat amongst a crowd of passionate music-lovers listening to Schubert's string quartet in G major. "Let the music fill you up and carry you away, " was about all the advise I could give him.

The lovely young thing sitting next to us, who must of been a student at IU's School of Music, sat there with her eyes closed. I could practically feel her spirit soaring up above the stage, pulsing with the ebb and flow of the violins and cello.

From our second story balcony seats, I watched beads of sweat fly from the second violinist's brow with each deep thrust of his bow.

It was completely seductive.

Nada Yoga means union through sound. It is the ancient spiritual art and science of inner transformation through sound and tone. Meditation on sound is one universal path to Self Realization, accessible to anyone, and appropriate for people of any religion or spiritual aspiration.

Back in the concert hall, my son wants his granola bar. I dare not attempt to unwrap it, for fear of rudely awakening anyone from their nada yoga experience. Instead, I hand him an apple, and hope for the best.

Amazing things happen when a concert hall full of people are deeply concentrated on listening to the music. Things like a three-year-old boy being able to sit still(ish) for over thirty-minutes while he hums softly and begins to understand what it means to be "at one with the music".

Then, just like that, it was over. The crowd applauded adoringly. The musician left the stage, and both me and my son looked at each other like someone pulled the plug out of our music box. Was that it? No, just the intermission.

Earlier this week, after the third day of my son waking me up asking if we were going to the concert today, I had to sit him down and talk about expectations. I feared he would be greatly disappointed. It was just a free concert, so there might not be a lot of people. It might be a small stage; a small concert, with just a couple people playing music.

But one look into his eyes at that moment, I knew for sure, he wasn't disappointed.

I was so grateful for this moment for so many reason. Firstly, to live in a small community that has access to beautiful concert halls and world renown musicians. Thankful for people who follow their passion, and have the determination and will to practice, and then share their passion with us.

And, what a blessing to be able to share a simple beautiful moment, one without thoughts or words, with others (especially one that I love).

Yoga Post Baby - A Stronger Woman From the Inside Out

One month after baby, I started getting back into yoga regularly. It wasn't much of a choice really. After about five months of not being able to do much of anything very physical, even deep breathing, my natural energy and vitality meter read...zero. I couldn't stand my blah self anymore, so I turned to yoga and pranayama to fix it.

That was early December. Two months later, I feel like a different person. (No, this is not a paid advertisement for yoga). Not only is my vitality back, but I feel like I have a whole new lease on life. My inner creativity is bursting! My zest for life has come back! I can see the good in people and wake up inspired to live a new day again.

Like anything, it has been a journey. As I have mentioned in My Yogi Dark Side, I have not been a home practice sort of gal. Through desperation and against my natural tendency, I have forced myself to do at least five minutes a day (but hopefully much more) of yoga, or meditation or deep-focused breathing.

Some days I have completely failed. I have let life and all its chaos suck me in. Those were probably the days I needed to do it most. Those were the days I felt so uncentered and stressed and pulled in a zillion directions.  If I was having one of those days, and I managed to get a little session in, I found my world all of a sudden stopped spinning and the anxiety started to fade into the background.

Why just yesterday I managed to do a really nice yoga session on the porch. At dinner, we ate 1.5hrs later than usual (a no-no in my household with three peaceful people who turn into fire-breathing dragons when they are hungry). While being argued with and 'button-pushed'  by my partner on one side of the table, and tested with the patience of job on the other side of the table with the whining, distributive, can't-stay-still-in-his-seat overly-sugered three-year-old son,  I - remained - completely - calm. Yep.

I know for a fact it was the yoga. I can feel when I don't do enough, and those are the days  my emotions can get the best of me. Those are the days I react instantly instead of taking a breath and staying calm.

My breathing and yoga practices are nothing near physically intense as they used to be. If I do some advanced poses it is because I am warmed up and ready for them. I haven't pushed myself much. And I am okay with that. I know it will all come back in due time.

Yet, my practices (when I get past the 10 minute mark) are still very intense for a different reason. My focus gets sharper each time, and is intimately intertwined on my breath. My moves now are gentle, mindful, grateful and full of love. As a result, I am in tune with the subtleties of breath and body, and I am able to go deep. I feel calm and centered afterward, with an increased vibration. Yeah, I feel totally buzzed.

Pre-baby tough yogi

Prior to becoming a mother, my practice was competitive (mostly against myself), bold, fiery, with only a hint of grace. 

I was focused on breath and body, but it was a whole different game. It was all drive, and lots of ego. There was less compassion, understanding, and not enough love for my body and spirit.   

Actually, I had a deep awakening after my first vipassana retreat (pre-kids). Meditating so deeply for days on end on nothing but my body, I could feel all the fiery knots I had planted into my body. I knew a lot of the knots where there because I was so bent on pushing myself too much in my ashtanga yoga practice. (Kind of ironic, eh)

Yes, yoga had done me lots of good, but it was clear to me I needed to re-gig my mind a bit in my practice. I needed a good dose of self-love. Pure loving-compassion is akin to pure-consciousness. When emminating pure loving-compassion, you are showering down high voltages of pure consciousness waves.

On becoming a mother, I got to practice a whole lot of nothing but emminating pure loving-l\kindness to my baby. Really, at that point in my life there wasn't much to do all day other than "just be" with my baby and love him no matter what. You can't blame a baby, or "change" a baby. You can only send love to your baby. (Well, you can send other things, but it won't help anything). We didn't have tv or high-speed internet. No second car. New place in the country and no friends. It was like a mediation retreat - with not a lot of sleeping, and a lot of just sitting there holding/nursing/comforting.

The real me - pjs and no makeup

My point is, that becoming a mother helped me to get very good at channeling that universal divine force, manifested as loving-compassion, or a mother's love for her child.

Being a mother has helped me to connect more deeply with that force, and turn the love inward on myself.

Being a mother has helped me "get over myself".

Being a mother has brought me more joy in spontaneous moments than I knew could exist.

For all these reasons, coming back to the mat now, I feel like a totally different person than the pre-baby yoga me. I am becoming the woman that I was striving so hard to be in the first place. I may not be nearly as physically strong, (I am certainly now more lean and supple), but my heart is now opened and generates my strength. I may not have as much prana stored in my body at the moment, but I am working on building that back up again too.

I am definitely a stronger woman from the inside out, and that to me is worth losing my long strong warrior pose. I have gained much more than a softer belly.

Thank you, my children, for feeding my heart

Yogi Son

Flying yogini daughter

How To Make an Eye Pillow

Eye pillows are great for relaxing in savasana. Along with the aromatherapy benefits, eye pillows help calm facial muscles and relax tired eyes. The weight of the pillow presses on acupressure points around the eyes, helping to alleviate tension and relieve headaches.

Making your own eye pillow is easy and fun. You don't need anything fancier than an old (clean!) sock or t-shirt, and white rice. You can make it as fancy as you wish though. Experiment by adding your favorite essential oil or dried herb.

Plus, I believe you can actually feel the love that went into making the pillow when you use it.  

1. Measure and cut out a 8.5 x 4.5 inch rectangle of your selected material. 
I suggest using material that has a stretch to it and can breathe, like jersey. Natural fabrics breathe and feel better.  If you don't have new fabric, you can always use an old t-shirt, or a  sock.

2. Sew around the edges leaving a half inch "hole" at the end.

3. Open the "hole" and stuff the material through, turning the pillow inside out.
All the stitching should be tucked in on the inside.

4. Fill the pillow with your desired filling. 
I used white rice because it is inexpensive and I know it will keep well. Use can also use lavender, flax seeds, beans, millet hulls, or buckwheat. To add a scent to the filling, you can use 15 - 20 drops of an essential oil. You can also add a sprig of lavender or sage, or your favorite herb.

We used a straw to help push the rice through

5. Sew up the hole.

6. You can make a little pillowcase for your eye pillow.  This way you can wash the cover if the pillow gets soiled.

Yogi Confession Box 1.0

Dear Deep Sweet Inner Self:

I confess, it has been four or fives days since our last deep connect. I long for you, yet "stuff" gets in the way. Yesterday, I tried. I unrolled my mat. Forehead to mat, arms out stretched. I remember those two deep, beautiful, full breaths. Ahhhhhhh.

My mind cleared. The world dropped away. There was nothing but you and me in that moment. Deep within that breath, there was stillness, and I saw a tiny little sparkle of you winking at me, omnipresent, waiting there deep within me fully present and unconditional.

Then the baby screamed bloody Mary, and the 3-year-old demanded his treat of the day like a little devil jumping up and down with a pitch fork.

I said good bye to you as quickly as I said hello, and away I went.

Two breaths weren't quite enough to get my center back. I have been feeling completely off-quilter since our last connect. Perhaps that is why the world seems to be two steps ahead of me these last few days. Both my mind and my emotions storming around, as if battling it out for King of my Kingdom.

Why won't you fight to be King, my sweet deep inner Self?

Ah, not your style. I forgot.

Okay, my concerted effort restarts again tomorrow. I promise to give you, at very least, five-minutes a day of single-pointed attention. Then after my yoga practice, I promise to  work on my daily mindfulness practice, and continue to love unconditionally while creating peace and good things for all where ever I may go.

OM!

Why Should I Make My Own Valentine?

Making your own Valentine, no matter what age, is an easy and fun February craft.

As an adult, I have always made a Valentine's card for my sweetheart. It is a nice excuse to be creative, and express myself visually and verbally. Not to mention, why give Hallmark my five dollars!

As a parent, having your kids make their own Valentines will encourage your them to be more creative, and instead of encouraging them to be consumers. The end result will be more unique, made from the heart, and something they can take joy in.

What if your kid has 30+ people in their class?
Great! What better way to teach your child how to focus on a big project. You can break it down into decorating five cards a night. They reap the rewards of accomplishing a big project.

Challenge yourself - add an environmental twist
See if you can make your Valentines all out of recycled, trashed or let over materials!

Use making your own Valentine's an excuse to:

- practice focusing on one task single-mindedly, parents and children (no checking emails!)

- nurture one-on-one quality connections with you and your spirit, and/or you and your child.

- practice expressing gratitude for the important things in life: love and friendship.

- talk to your child about the importance of expressing feelings of love, joy and gratitude.

- teach your kids about why it is important to create things from the heart instead of just buying something mass-produced.

Save your money!

Use it on more important things, like chocolates and candy!

Family Creation Day 2: Is it Worth It?

It's the second Sunday of our new family "Creation Day", where we all try to be a little more creative, especially as a family. Already it feels like a pain-in-the-asana instead of the inspiring, fun, Brady Bunch-esq moments that it was supposed to be.

The day ended on a good note: as a whole family we danced while laughing and interacting together, danced in our own worlds, and flowed in and out of the two letting our body's loose!

However, the morning was a different story. The leader of the day woke up on the wrong side of the bed. She spent the majority of the morning entertaining her son while wishing desperately to be left alone to loose herself in a book, or online, or in some other meaningless task so that she wouldn't be face-to-face with how grumpy and completely wiped out she was feeling at that particular moment.

Okay it was me. And I'm blaming it on the glass (okay two) of red wine I had last night in a reckless adult moment in between the baby crying.

Of course, when I want to be left alone to my grumpiness, my son instinctually ramps up his need for high-power-interaction. This creates a drama cycle between us that by afternoon spirals out of control. When it finally came time to create our new "show", my heart was not in it. It didn't contain the exhilarating excitement of spontaneity that creating something together had last week.

Last week we were in sync. We brainstormed with gusto. Everything each other suggested seemed like sheer brilliance! We were rocking! We were on fire!

This week, creating a drama was just sheer, well, drama.There was the bickering over costumes, "no, we need actual costumes, not pretend costumes."
"Why?"
"Because we are creating a real show. And it is more fun with real costumes."
"Oh, but I don't wanna wear a costume."
"But you have to!"

And more bickering over story lines.
"No, you can't run down the hall into your room. The audience can't see you when you go into your room."

(Me growing weary and tired of this already) "at some point, you know, you have to surrender."
"Why?"
"Well, we have to actually END this show. We can't go on fighting and fighting, and escaping from jail and escaping from jail all day. You are the bad guy. I am the good guy. I have to win at some point."

Next the rehearsal dramas,
"No, that is not how we did it last time. You have to run away first, and then the second time we fight..."

And then,
"Get back here! Get out of your room! I just told you...."

Now ready to finally present the skit to dad:
"Put on your bandanna!"
"I don't wanna wear it!"
"But it looks so cute! Bandits always wear bandanna."
Sulking, and reluctantly he puts it on.

Dad comes in the living room to watch. We are ready to present. Baby wakes up and screams and I have to stop to feed her. My son sulks and takes off his bandanna. I cringe.

Okay, we are really ready now.
Part 1 commences and the Bakery Bandit Boy enters stage left. (It is his big debut. He has his intro line that we have been practicing. He forgets it. I prompt him from the side).

Without enthusiasm he says, "I am the Bakery Bandit, and I am going to steal all these pies." He starts to put the pies in his bag and I, the sheriff, enter on my horse: "AH HA! I will get you!" and off runs Bakery Bandit Boy to his room, where upon he slams the door. He is supposed to run away and then come immediately back while I hide in the Bakery.

He doesn't come back.

We wait.

We wait some more....

He has locked himself in his room.

He cannot get out.

How many times have I told him not to lock his door. 

How many times have I given him lessons on how to unlock the door.

It was the straw that broke this (non)yogi's back. I left him there and went downstairs to relish in my grumpiness alone.

Oh the drama.

Thankfully our libra friend Stephanie came over to visit, bringing with her a happy peaceful energy enough to squeeze peace from the grumpiest of grumpy scorpio families.

My son and I finally apologized to one another. After bribing him with a piece of Stephanie's cookie, my son reluctantly agreed to present the skit to our now doubled-sized audience. He said his lines without gusto again, but in no time, perked up and got into full Bandit power! He enacts the skits just how he is supposed to, even allowing me to capture him easily and finally win. We finish off our skit, relishing in the applause, bowing, and even smiling at each other and hugging with genuine happiness in our hearts.

Was it worth forcing myself to create the skit even though my heart wasn't in it? The show must go on right? I am not sure it was worth all the drama. I think next time, I need to somehow rejuvenate myself, maybe with a quick five minute breathing exercise, or something, in order to regain my center.

I am the parent after all. It is I who has the greatest influence on the outcome. I know I could of easily turned the whole thing around if I was more centered - ie more patient, compassionate, better at listening to his needs and compromising. I was just trying to muscle through and ended up setting off land-mind after land-mind with my own mind not in the right place.

This creating stuff is easy when you are in the mood. It is hell when you are not. I sympathize for real artists!

Redemption

After a not-so-quick solo trip to the grocery store by yours truly, followed by a nice dinner, our family reconvened in the rec room ready to let loose. Hubs selected the music, and together we let the music feed us until our bodies moved, our hearts shone and laughter left our lips.

Let's Dance!
(No babies were harmed in the taking of this photo)

Together we swam like we were underwater, galloped around in circles like horses, created crazy spazzed out dance moves, and let our body loose! We danced interacting together, and we dance in our own worlds, flowing in and out of the two.

It was so freeing to just let go and dance uninhibited. At one point, I got so into the Jamiroquai song I choose, reliving my clubbing days, that I didn't even notice I was dancing hardcore all by myself while the boys had temporarily left the room. Part of me didn't want to stop dancing, I was having so much fun.

Dare I say, even my reluctant husband had a blast dancing around with us. And you know what, with my whole heart, I loved-every-minute. It was a simple thing to do, and it only lasted for three songs (everyone picked one song), but it brought us all together for a moment in time.

And with that, I am satisfied that our Family Creation Day #2 wasn't a complete drama downer after all.

Read about our first Family Sunday Creation Day.

Just Breathe - 5 Minute Exercise To Revitalize Mind/Body

When I practice deep conscious breathing, even for five minutes, my mind is always more quiet, and body more relaxed. The inhalation picks me up and gets me resonating to a higher vibration, while the exhalation lets me let it all go...

Check in, when you are feeling overwhelmed or anxious, notice your breathing. You will probably be breathing quick shallow breaths using just your upper chest while overworking your shoulder and neck muscles to complete the breath.

The mind rides the breath. When the mind is wild, so is the breath. When the mind is calm, the breath is slow and deep. Notice a sleeping baby. They seem to breath with their whole body. When you force the breath to slow, so does your mind. It is all interrelated.

Below is a short but effective deep breathing exercise to revitalize the body and still the mind. I love to start my yoga classes off with it. Balasana, or child's pose, is a great pose to stretch hips, thighs and ankles, as well as strengthens the spine - a perfect compliment for those who sit a lot.

1 - Lay in child's pose with your arms outstretched. 
Feet together, or apart, whatever feels best. If your seat isn't supported on your legs or mat, try sticking a pillow or blanket under your seat for support. If you have troubles pointing your toes (or this pose hurts your feet) try sticking a rolled up blanket under your ankles. You want this pose to be as comfortable as possible so you can focus on your breath.

2 - Inhale while counting to five slowly, then exhale while counting to five slowly.
Just focus on completely filling, then emptying the lungs. Let go of any thoughts, and keep focused on the breath. Repeat five to ten times.

3 - Inhale for seven counts, exhale for seven counts.
At the top of your inhalation, focus on bringing air and movement into your back ribs. At the bottom of your exhalation, focus on drawing your belly inwards towards your spine, squeezing out all your air. Repeat five to ten time.

4 - Inhale for seven counts, focusing on expansion, exhale for seven counts, focus on contraction of the spine.
While breathing in, focus on the spine getting longer in both directions. As you breath in, feel the back of the pelvis, sacrum and tail bone softening and growing longer, like you are growing a tail. Exhale, feel the pelvis naturally tuck under as you squeeze out all the air. The pubic bone moves toward your sternum, shortening your spine. Repeat as much as you wish.

At first, deep breathing exercises like this one may be difficult to do. It takes a while before  you develop control over breathing muscles, or have the ability to let go of the mind and focus completely on the body. The more you try though, the easier it becomes and the better you will feel.

Practicing conscious deep breathing triggers the parasympathetic nervous system to respond. This response helps to relax and renew the body. In fact, practicing conscious breathing actually allows the body to store prana, or vital life energy. 

Vigor, power, vitality, life and spirit are all forms of prana. According to the Upanisads, prana is the breath of life of all beings in the universe. They are born through and live by it, and when they die their individual breath dissolves into the cosmic breath.

"Inhalation is the act of receiving the primeval energy in the form of breath, and retention is when the breath is held in order to savor that energy. In exhalation all thoughts and emotions are emptied with breath: then, while the lungs are empty, one surrenders the individual energy, "I", to the primeval energy, the Atma." 
B.K.S. Iyengar